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To hold anger is to blacken one’s soul

We all have feelings. This is what we are born with, and we separate them farther from one another as we get older. Using these emotions to the fullness of their power is what shows how humans are different from other creatures on earth. Below, you will see a list of human emotions. I ask that you read each word and decide what these words mean to you. I also want you to notice that love is at the top and fear is at the bottom of the list. 

Definition of Fear is:

  1. (countable) A phobia, a sense of fear induced by something or someone.Not everybody has the same fears.  I have a fear of ants.
  2. (uncountable) A strong, uncontrollable, unpleasant emotion or feeling caused by actual or perceived danger or threat. He was struck by fear on seeing the snake.
  3. (uncountableTerrified veneration  or reverence, particularly towards God.
A woman bound, blindfolded and beaten shows true fear

Love is the most positive emotion we have, while fear is the most negative. All other emotions may be placed in a different order than seen here. This is just the way I lined them up from positive to negative in my thought process. If you wish to move the emotions in the list the way you feel they should fall, I suggest you do so. Furthermore, I maintain that “love” and “fear” remain in the positions I have assigned them. You may disagree with the statement that fear is the furthest from love, but that is because we have been describing this emotion incorrectly for many years. Fear is very powerful and not to be used lightly. When someone jumps out and scares you, this may be “surprise” or cause “anxiety,” but not true fear. One could even use annoyance, frustration, confusion, and many other emotions, but not necessarily “fear.”

  • Love
  • Happiness
  • Satisfaction
  • Affection
  • Self-confidence
  • Gratitude
  • Surprise
  • Sadness
  • Frustration
  • Embarrassment
  • Confusion
  • Boredom
  • Loneliness
  • Anxiety 
  • Shame
  • Annoyance
  • Disappointment
  • Jealousy
  • Pride
  • Envy
  • Disgust
  • Loathing
  • Anger
  • Fear

 

There are many that can be mixed with each other to form a hybrid of emotions. For example, we can take surprise and embarrassment and put them together to form a hybrid of what a certain situation may call for.

Many of the emotions listed above fall into the positive realm, like affection and gratitude. Others land in the negative realm, like fear and envy. Some may even teeter between the two realms, like surprise and pride. Although these last two can clearly be put on one side or the other, there are times when they may lean to the other side, given the right circumstance. Furthermore, they may be used in one realm while being misinterpreted by others or landing on the opposite side from what was meant. A great example is when a woman cries (in happiness or sadness).

Looking again at our list above, choose which of these words holds the most power. I would venture to guess that “love” is the response of more than 98 percent of those reading this post. I will not argue the point that “love” is a very powerful emotion. This is an emotion that is hard to explain but is very powerful when one experiences it. This is the emotion we all wish to have in our lives, and for good reason. The old adage, “Love makes the world go round,” holds a lot of truth to it. Besides, who doesn’t want love in their lives?

So, if love is the most powerful emotion, then we see the positive side as the powerful side. However, with the positive, there are also negatives. This is the side I wish to talk about today. Although the positive makes us feel all warm and fuzzy, we must also be aware of the negative. The negative can and will destroy all that we wish to experience in life. We look for love, but we dismiss what may keep us from achieving it. Take another look at the list above and see which word stands out other than love. Did you find it? Many of you may want to choose the opposite of love and choose fear. This would be a great choice, but not what I am aiming for.

Anger blackens one’s soul!

Man, in a shroud, yells with anger, consuming him.

Anger that is not released will do more destruction to your body than you will ever know. Anger that is not released will continue to build and consume whoever holds it close! Do you have true anger, or is it annoyance or maybe frustration? This is a question you must ask yourself. Anger is a black hole that will continue to consume you until all other emotions are devoured within its impenetrable shield! Anger is very dangerous to play with. Do we get angry once in a while? Of course we do. This is human nature. What is not in our nature is to hold onto anger and feed it until it consumes us. Let it go! Release the anger before it becomes the cancer it can become. Replace your anger with forgiveness and allow your innermost core to heal itself.

One thing you may consider is that it is easy to stay angry and build a life around it. It takes a stronger person to use his or her strength to release the anger and allow your insides some much-needed rest. When we are angry, our whole body, inside and out, is tensed up. This can cause harm to the body over time. not to mention the psychological pressure we are putting on ourselves. Think of how you feel when you are angry and the difference you feel when you practice forgiveness. Your body and mind will show you the difference. Do you want to feel the stress of anger, or would you rather feel the relief of peace? You can’t have both at the same time. Anger and rest are not compatible and can’t coexist. You must choose!

A person on the beach at sunset completely at peace

You may take my advice on anger or kick it to the curb. This is completely up to you. However, from one soul to another, I have lived with and without holding anger. I can honestly say that living without it is a better and healthier way to live. Take care, my friends, and remember, we are all in this together. 

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short stories

Tips on Drawing on Your Inner Strength

Written by special guest Julia Mitchell of  outspiration.net for Common-Sense Interaction.

Emerge Stronger and More Resilient Than Ever

Woman writer in her office typing on computer
Image via Pexels

If your desire is to not only achieve more for yourself in this life, but also to grow in ways you never imagined, you’ll likely have to dig deep and draw strength from those reserves you never knew you had. Here are some helpful tips from outspiration.net on how to achieve that level of growth you always knew you were capable of.

Practice self-care more often

If you want to achieve more and be more, then you must be willing to put in the time to take care of yourself first. Some would even argue that without self-care, you aren’t likely to make it as far because you forget about the most crucial person in your growth journey – you!

Breaking out of your comfort zone

Perhaps the one thing that’s limiting you from achieving your dreams is your current career, in which case now may be the perfect time to step out to pursue that dream job you’ve always wanted. But first, you’ll probably have to think of redoing your resume to put your best self out there. Speaking of, you can create a phenomenal-looking resume from scratch with a resume builder if you’re stuck for inspiration. Just select a suitable template online and add your information, your photo, the relevant colors, etc.

Tidying up your home

Two ladies putting on rubber gloves to clean the house

The condition of your home could also be something that’s hindering your personal growth due to bad energy that’s just sapping every ounce of creativity out of you. If this is the case, then it may be beneficial to rid your home of any bad energy by decluttering and tidying up to create a clutter-free, more inspirational environment.

Reaching for the stars

Suppose you feel like one of the few ways to achieve the growth you’ve never known before is to reach for the stars to test your true capabilities. For example, you may think that starting your own business is the key to your success. Furthermore, you’ll need to choose a business structure that has success written all over it, such as an LLC, for instance, because its benefits such as greater flexibility, lesser paperwork, and the fact that it has more tax advantages stand out to you as a recipe for success. Just be sure that if you decide to start an LLC, you check what the filing regulations are in your state, as the rules and requirements can change from place to place.

Thinking more positively

Focus on what you’re thinking about if you want to change the course of your future. While this may seem like a piece of advice that’s too good to be true, it is helpful advice that could end up fast tracking your quest for personal growth quicker than you thought possible. Moreover, thinking positively leaves little room to think negatively, something you should avoid if you don’t want to be held back.

Adopt better habits

Lady eating a bowl of fruit to stay healthy

Suppose some habits in your life could be changed for the better, then you should focus on identifying these, so you can adapt and change them for the better. For example, you might find it challenging to get up on time, and the day just seems to slip away from you timewise. Then make it a habit to wake up earlier at the sound of your alarm clock, so you can get to more and be more productive during the day. Or perhaps it’s unhealthy eating that’s your downfall, or not exercising enough, in which case you need to take those steps towards a positive and healthier lifestyle. Reaching your goals growth-wise is sure to be quite the journey. But you’re likely to appreciate your efforts, especially when you emerge more robust, resilient, and capable than ever.

Words are powerful

Think of your words as a drop of water and the world around you as a lake. One single drop will cause ripples for a long way. Many drops can cause a disturbance throughout the lake. The power of our words is absolutely amazing. Our actions also speak loudly but are secondary to our words. There is only positive or negative thought. There are no gray areas to cling to. Which side of the line do you want to work with, positive or negative? One will bring you and others joy. The other will keep others away from you and joy will be but a dream.

Drop of water hitting a puddle of water

You may have heard a child say “sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me.” This is a nice thought but so untrue. You can do more damage with your words then you could ever do with sticks and stones! Our words can hurt ourselves as well as others because our words show who we are and what we want. We may also help others as well as ourselves with the proper words. Words are as magnets, held one way and the magnets attract, the other way and they repel. We need to take charge of our words. The first part of this process is to change our mindset. A negative person will always show their anger, grief, and disappointment with their words. On the other hand, a positive person will show joy, accomplishment and leadership with their words.

Why is it that a negative person can never accomplish anything worthwhile and are jealous of the positive person? A positive person has the world by the throat and can accomplish anything they set their minds to. This all starts with a mindset and is shown with the words that are used daily. If you want to be happy and a successful person, you need to learn what it takes. The first step is learning how to express yourself in a positive way and your words are key for this to work.

Stacks of scrabble pieces that spell out "words"

Here is an example of what I am talking about. If you use alot of curse words, (these words are a very negative type of speech) you will feel dragged down, angry and unsure of yourself. If you use positive words, (these are upbeat words) even when things are troublesome, you will feel a power of accomplishment and the secrets of how to fix said troubles with ease.

The second part to this is your actions.  Do you carry yourself in a positive way or are you slumping around looking like the definition of despair? Your body actions tell alot about you. Words and actions work together. It is extremely hard to speak positive and slump around at the same time. It is also very difficult to speak negative and walk with a positive stance. Pay attention to how your body automatically shows whether you are using positive or negative words. It will enlighten you, I promise.

Open Bible

So how do we change the way we speak and make sure we are on the positive side? Firstly, you must think before you speak. There’s a saying that goes, “It is better to be thought of as a fool then to open one’s mouth and remove all doubt”. One translation of this is, if you can’t say something positive, keep quiet. Another translation is, don’t speak of things and other people you know nothing about. Either way, this shows positive and negative thought. This has been a problem that I have fought for many years but if you can put your mind to it, it is very possible and probable you will succeed. We also need something to believe in that helps us stay positive. Most of the time this falls under religious beliefs.  If you are following a religion that preaches a positive message about the one you follow, then this is a very good thing to grasp upon. It will help when you have that time where nothing seems to be going right. I believe I have this with being a Christian. You must answer your own questions about your faith.

I wish the best for you and hope you find this useful. Stay positive, hold on to your beliefs and dreams. Remember, we are all in this together.

Hopeful vs lucky

Hope is its own entity that must be fed constantly. Hope is what drives the human spirit to great achievements as well as keeping us in tune with the goals we set for our lives. Without hope, we are just like dust in the wind, ( no meaning and without direction ).

Some people tend to lean upon luck as their driving force. This is a great mistake and tends to lead to great failures as well. Luck is the opposite of hope and leads us to think in negative ways. When you stay living with luck, you are allowing others as well as your surroundings to control what happens in your life. This my friends is no way to live if you wish to have happiness in your life.

Lady closing her eyes and crossing her fingers

Let me see if I can get my point across in a way that may make more sense. Do you have dreams of what you want out of this life? Do you see something that you want and it makes your spirit leap because you can see the possibility of possessing such an object or situation? These are hopeful thoughts and they bring joy to us. Females are very good at this. Sometimes as early as twelve years old, a girl is already in a dream state of her wedding later in life. She is hoping for a good man that will bring her joy and a wedding that will be the envy of her friends. This woman didn’t get lucky to find a good man, she has been planning for years.

Have you ever seen someone who tends to have everything go their way? Of course, most will commit how lucky this person is. But maybe, just maybe this person knows something that you don’t and is using it to help things go their way. These people understand the difference between hope and luck.

If you win the lottery, are you hopeful or lucky? Wow, trick question right? This is not a trick question. Believe it or not, you are starting with hope but relying on luck. I bet you didn’t expect that answer, did you? If it started with luck, then you wouldn’t have bought that lottery ticket. It would just magically be that you won the lottery. You see even though you may feel lucky, you actually were using hope to start with because you did put in the effort and money to purchase that ticket. Now this is what I call “working against yourself.” While you did have hope to start with, you changed it to luck/chance in the aftermath. You essentially took a positive and turned it into a negative. Negative, meaning that you are now allowing someone or something to take control away from you. This is one reason why any kind of gambling can be addictive and cost you everything. You think you are working in the positive when in actuality, you have been leaning alot farther into the negative without even knowing it.

Have I lost you yet? Let’s try this a slightly different way. Hope consists of putting some form of effort into the situation. This can be thought, money, time or even the old adage; blood, sweat and tears. Whatever it is, there must be something from you to create it. Luck on the other hand, just automatically appears. You are at the mercy of whatever force is controlling the situation.

The highest form of hope is faith. Now some might say that is just for people who are religious. This is untrue. Although faith is used by some religions, it is also used outside of the church. If you look at the definition of faith, the first part will show like this: 1. A trust or confidence in the intentions or abilities of a person, object or ideal from prior empirical evidence. Here is a simple thought on faith. Your child has faith that you will take care of them. This is much stronger than hope.

A baby hold a mother's finger

Why did I bring up the word faith while talking about hope you might be asking. This is because when you use the word hope, it doesn’t quite have a full meaning to what I’m trying to get across. Using the word faith tends to have a greater meaning for people. To show you what I mean, here is a definition of hope: 1. the feeling of trust, confidence, belief or expectation that something wished for can or will happen.

Now that I have shown what hope is and the higher side of hope which is faith, let’s take a look at the definition of luck. Luck 1. something that happens by chance, a chance occurrence, especially a favorable one.

Do you understand now why I believe we must live by hope/faith instead of luck. With hope/faith you are taking control while luck is just something that happens and may or may not show up for you. Take control today. Here is my final word on this subject. This may or not make sense to you. “Faith is a substance of things hoped for and evidence of things not seen.” If you would like to know where you can find this, I will be happy to share. Take care my friends and Remember, we are all in this together.

Categories
short stories

Doubt your Doubts

      This, my friends, is going to be fun to write. I get excited every time I think about the concept I will be teaching today. Everything yesterday, today and in the future deals with two basic concepts, positive and negative. No matter what it is we deal with in life, we are still creatures of these two thought patterns. If you are a positive person, then this post will help you with those minimal times of doubt. If you are a negative person…. well you need to read this post over and over again. Hopefully, you will gain a positive outlook on your life and those around you.

Lady with arms folded showing doubt

      Doubt comes no matter who you are or in what circumstances you are dealing with in life. Even the most positive person will allow doubt to creep in, sometimes even unnoticed. Why do we doubt things and even ourselves at times? Doubt can be considered as that extra sense that can cause all kinds of havoc. Some suggest that our sixth sense is one that lets us know that something is about to happen or something may not be right. Doubt will hang on to this sixth sense like an ugly little monster that just wants to destroy what you are doing in life. So what is this creepy thing we call doubt? The definition of doubt is; To be undecided about; to lack confidence in; to disbelieve, to question.
Synonyms: distrust, mistrust. So basically put, this is negatively in its purest form.

      If you are in a situation where this ugly little thing called doubt is getting involved, there is a problem with the situation or with you. At this point, you must be honest with yourself and decide if the situation, or you are at fault. Sometimes this can be real tricky because your mind will mess with you and create more doubt. So what are we to do to resolve this problem? You have to ask yourself some questions to decide whether doubt is a warning connected to that sixth sense or is it worry, lack of confidence or just plain fear. Here are some questions to ask yourself. Do the facts line up? Am I working with a positive attitude, or am I lurking into the dark shadows of negativity? Am I dealing with a positive or negative person? Have I done this before and did it work? Do I believe in myself? Am I over thinking the situation or process?

Lady with arms folded on desk in deep thought

      Once you have answered these questions that you have presented yourself, you can allow the true magic to happen. The magic isn’t magic at all, but it will feel like it. Here we go! You must doubt your doubts! That’s right. If you doubt your doubts, then you can remove all doubt. You can now make a positive choice whether to go through with it or not. You have officially removed the negativity that led to the doubt in the first place.

      Always keep in mind that a person who lives with doubt can never accomplish anything of value. These are the naysayers that believe nothing good can come of anything. These are the negative people I spoke about. These people will go through life just bouncing along with no goals. You can set all the goals you want, but living in doubt means you will never accomplish any of said goals.

       How can a concept so simple be so hard to learn? It’s not hard to learn at all, my friends. I just gave you the formula to positive thinking. If you find yourself dealing with a negative person (doubter), you better take warning. These people are toxic to you if you follow their direction. Instead, do what you say you can do instead of folding up camp because they said you can’t. Once you have done it, maybe, just maybe, you can take the doubt out of the doubter and help change a negative person to a positive one.

Lady with a smile talking in bullhorn

      This world runs on eighty percent negative and twenty percent positive.  It’s the twenty percent that keeps the world creating new and wonderful things. It’s the eighty percent that slow down progress. Don’t be part of the eighty. Stand tall with the twenty! I sure hope I got my point across. I picked this idea up from a wise man and ran with it in my own way to help explain to you, my readers, in the simplest way I know how. Don’t forget to doubt your doubts to remove all doubt. As always, take care and remember, we are all in this together.

Tell me I can’t, Please!!!

The best way to get a positive person to achieve something is to tell them they can’t do it. On the other hand, if you tell a negative person the same thing, they will quit.

I refuse to let anybody convince me I can’t accomplish what I strive to do. I will never say something is impossible because I have learned this statement to be untrue. The impossible is very possible given the right circumstances. The impossible has become possible over and over again. There was a time not too long ago when the thought of getting into a machine that could fly was an absolute impossibility. Yet here we are with not just one machine that can fly, but thousands of them all over the world.

Commercial airliner flying

A positive person will continue to work on a problem until a solution is presented. A negative person will quit as soon as the problem becomes too much of a stretch. I have had times that I have been a negative person, usually after a great hurt in my life. For the most part, I am a very positive person and I love it when someone tells me I can’t do something. This creates a great drive in my spirit and I am able to achieve things that even I wasn’t sure I could do.

Not once but a few times in my lifetime, I have had people say that they are positive they can’t do something. Even worse, I have had someone tell me that they are positive that I can’t do something. This, even if it is meant to be funny, is an ugly thing to say. This my friends, is what is known as a double negative and will in turn teach your brain to be negative.

How do we live being positive and not negative through life? I was lucky to have parents that started me on my journey of a positive life. After I left to be on my own, the United States Navy helped me to become even more positive. I learned to accomplish things that seemed impossible until I achieved them. I thought this was where becoming a positive person came from. Even though this did help me on my path, this was not ultimately the answer to the question.

Typewriter with Goals typed on paper

Becoming a positive person starts with a kind of stubbornness of refusing to quit. This is a mindset that you put upon yourself. It comes from the accomplishment of finding the solution to a problem. How can you say that you are a positive person, if you have never reached a goal? Now this is where I’m going to tell you something that may upset you. If you don’t set goals, this is also a way of being a negative person. That’s right! You cannot be a truly positive person without goals. Just acting the part of saying things like, yes you can or yes I can, is not being positive. These are just empty words to make yourself and others feel good. You must accomplish something, then you can claim positivity.

Are you a positive person? What have you accomplished to claim this award? Are you setting and achieving goals? I sure hope that if you aren’t already, you will now after reading this post. Be positive my friends and Remember, we are all in this together.