short stories

We must mourn the loss of loved ones for the healing to begin

Death is the hardest thing for humans to understand. Death is a process we will all go through. We enter death without knowing what happens next. Will we be with our loved ones again or in a different place when our time comes? This is the greatest question, I believe, that has ever been asked. I have my beliefs, and you have yours. Only in death will we know who was right. 

As I grow older and friends and loved ones leave for the great beyond, I find loneliness slipping in. It truly becomes a greater task to find an end to the sadness and emptiness I feel. Must I continue to mourn until my dying day, or will peace find me before my time comes to an end? I’m at the age now where many of my friends are leaving this earth, and I start to wonder when my time might come. Although many die young as well as old, when we grow older, the wick of our candle grows shorter. With each passing breath, we are tempting fate. We shall die, and those who mourn us will do so as we did with so many others.

I suppose I should thank God for allowing me to get this far in life. I never believed I would see the age of thirty-three. I am now within days of my fifty-sixth birthday and am amazed that it has shown up so quickly. Where did all the years go? How is it that I still see myself in my twenties, but when I look in the mirror, those years are long past their existence? Have I fought the good fight? I believe I have. Have I spent my life wisely? This I must sadly say no to. There were so many choices, and yet I made few correct ones. 

I look to the youth to find my strength to go on. I have fought to maintain my breath and know that my time too is running out. Will it be today or one of the tomorrows yet to come? This I do not know the answer to. I shall continue taking one breath at a time until the breath no longer enters my body.

I am here only by the grace of God, for on my own, I would have been dust many years ago. Many choices with many failures, but I live on while I watch better people who deserve so much more, return to the ground beneath. “Why, Lord, have I been allowed to grow older while the young with so much to give are taken away?” Where do I fit in the grand scheme of things? Am I here only to write these words or to right my wrongs? If I must right my wrongs, I shall live forever. 

We all strive to leave this world on a good note, with many who will miss us and tell our tales. How can this happen when all those we know are already leaving? I mourn for those I have lost and find myself in a state of perpetual mourning. “Oh, Lord, let me have a break from this sadness. “Let me wake up to the living around me, and let the dead be few for a while.”

I write this with great sorrow in my heart as I learn of another friend being put to rest. I pray you have found the heaven you imagined, and your eternity will be one of true happiness, my friend. We followed the same God in life. May we meet once again after death. Peace be with you, “Big Jon.” You will be missed.

We must be allowed to mourn the passing of our loved ones. This does nothing for the dead but allows healing for the living. Our hearts break, and the repair is a long journey. Do not hold in what must be let out. Without wailing, our hearts cannot heal. Release the hurt and allow the healing to begin. May God be with you and yours. Remember, we are all in this together.

What impression will you leave behind?

If you were to die today, would you leave behind the impression you want to? Of course everybody would talk about how nice you were because that’s what people do. Do you believe in your heart all the nice things are true that are being said about you? Are you who you want people to remember or will they have to tell lies or think really hard to come up with something nice to say at your funeral?

There are alot of people that think they are good people because they say thank you or say pardon me some times. Or maybe they put some change in the bucket during Christmas when the bells are ringing. Does this make you a good person or are you just trying to make other people think you are. Who are you really?

These questions should be asked by everyone of themselves if they truly care. Possibly you don’t care and that’s fine by me. I have always tried to find the good in people, no matter what kind of person I’m dealing with. You maybe a 100% jerk but, I’m looking at more then you think you are showing to me.

It doesn’t matter if your rich, poor or what ethnic background you have. I’m looking for the true you and I want others to do the same with me. I have known people that have shown an outward appearance of being a good person, when they are really masking who they are. I believe that most people want to be good but, some don’t know how.

Woman looking over the top of a book

When I tell you that I am looking at more than your outwardly appearance, I really do mean it. You have probably heard the expression “the eyes are the windows to the soul”. There is some truth to this even though it is a little off the mark in my opinion. I believe the eyes can show the spirit of a person in who they truly are. We are a trinity. We are a spirt with a soul incased in a body.

If you don’t believe the eyes tell who a person is, focus on someone’s eyes without thinking of any other part of their body and see what you will. Let’s look at a example. If there is a person who has bandages covering their face with only their eyes visible, tell me you can’t see what they are thinking or feeling.

People can look at others body motions, like the hands or the way they stand and usually tell alot about what that person is thinking. If a person has their arms folded while talking to you, they are either insecure or very upset. Taking the rest of the body language with this motion will tell you which one it is. Police officers are trained alot in body language to help them with their jobs along with keeping themselves safe.

Body language can be deceiving with someone that has trained themselves to not use the same body language that is normal though. This is what makes the eyes so important. The only thing a person can train to change what the eyes show is a dead stare or crying of course. But the eyes are truly the one thing that will tell you more about a person then anything. The eyes are so special and not to be ignored. If I talk to you face to face, you will notice that I watch your eyes. I want to know what kind of person I am dealing with. Even the police officers will ask you to remove your sunglasses when they are telling you what you did wrong. Why would they do this unless your eyes tell them something about what you are thinking? Do you have a kind spirit that wants to be good or not. Your eyes tell the truth.

Are you being what you want people to remember you by? Money means nothing to you when your gone. Can’t take it with you. You will leave all that you have for others to use, whether for good or bad. Your memory however, will last and will be the only thing others  truly have of you. All the possessions are just things you once owned.

Men carrying casket

If you die today, what kind of memories are you leaving for others? Do you care? If not then you are probably not a good person and the nice things said at your funeral will be false.

Let’s all try to live like we want to be remembered. Love, forgiveness and hope for ourselves as well as others. Be a good spirit with a clean and clear soul. We never know when our last breath may come. God Bless you and your families. Remember, we are all in this together.

Good person (after dead)

I’m going to write about something that I have always had a problem with. Why is it, no matter what kind of person he or she was, people always say the one that died was a good person? Maybe it is proper during the funeral for the families sake but, if this is so and you don’t think this was a good person in life, then why are you at the funeral to begin with?

Tombstones at cemetery

How about the people that worked with said individual and knew they were a horrible person? When they hear of this person passing away, they always say they will be missed and what a great person he or she was. “Oh, it’s so sad that James passed away. I remember the time he waved at me and smiled.” Well, you knew him for forty years, I hope you can remember the one time he smiled and waved to you. Let’s face it, he was a horrible person in life and death only helps because you don’t have to deal with him anymore.

Maybe people say how great a person you were after you die just for their own peace of mind. Maybe there is more to it. Just possibly it’s because we see ourselves in that coffin and don’t want anyone to talk bad about us when it’s our turn. There are alot of theories out there but, I haven’t heard anyone trying to figure it out. I can say, if you plan on attending my funeral, you best speak truth. If you feel I was a terrible person, don’t hold back. Tell it like it is! I will have more respect for you if you tell the truth rather than lie to everyone.

One thing I will say is, once I’m gone, it doesn’t matter anymore. If I was a horrible person in life, then that is what I should be remembered for. If you feel like you need to say something but can’t think of anything nice without lying, then just say that I was what I was and leave it at that. Either show up at my funeral and speak the truth, be quiet or don’t show up at all.

Lady consoles another at funeral.

One thing I will say on this subject that does throw a wrench into matters is if you are related to the dead person. Sometimes we are required to show up at funerals and show our respect just because we are family. If we tell what a horrible person he or she was or if we don’t show up, we may be black balled by the rest of the family. This is the only excuse there is that is reasonable for a lie.

I will put this in print so if you need to, you can show the family members that I have given you permission not to show up or to tell exactly how you feel about me. Make sure you print this post so you have a record of it if you feel it may come in handy.

I wrote this post just to cause a question to be asked and answered. Why are people always good after they die? Can you answer this question? I look forward to your thoughts. Take care out there and Remember, we are all in this together.