I’m going to write about something that I have always had a problem with. Why is it, no matter what kind of person he or she was, people always say the one that died was a good person? Maybe it is proper during the funeral for the families sake but, if this is so and you don’t think this was a good person in life, then why are you at the funeral to begin with?
How about the people that worked with said individual and knew they were a horrible person? When they hear of this person passing away, they always say they will be missed and what a great person he or she was. “Oh, it’s so sad that James passed away. I remember the time he waved at me and smiled.” Well, you knew him for forty years, I hope you can remember the one time he smiled and waved to you. Let’s face it, he was a horrible person in life and death only helps because you don’t have to deal with him anymore.
Maybe people say how great a person you were after you die just for their own peace of mind. Maybe there is more to it. Just possibly it’s because we see ourselves in that coffin and don’t want anyone to talk bad about us when it’s our turn. There are alot of theories out there but, I haven’t heard anyone trying to figure it out. I can say, if you plan on attending my funeral, you best speak truth. If you feel I was a terrible person, don’t hold back. Tell it like it is! I will have more respect for you if you tell the truth rather than lie to everyone.
One thing I will say is, once I’m gone, it doesn’t matter anymore. If I was a horrible person in life, then that is what I should be remembered for. If you feel like you need to say something but can’t think of anything nice without lying, then just say that I was what I was and leave it at that. Either show up at my funeral and speak the truth, be quiet or don’t show up at all.
One thing I will say on this subject that does throw a wrench into matters is if you are related to the dead person. Sometimes we are required to show up at funerals and show our respect just because we are family. If we tell what a horrible person he or she was or if we don’t show up, we may be black balled by the rest of the family. This is the only excuse there is that is reasonable for a lie.
I will put this in print so if you need to, you can show the family members that I have given you permission not to show up or to tell exactly how you feel about me. Make sure you print this post so you have a record of it if you feel it may come in handy.
I wrote this post just to cause a question to be asked and answered. Why are people always good after they die? Can you answer this question? I look forward to your thoughts. Take care out there and Remember, we are all in this together.